It’s funny that in just 13 days after a major knee surgery my life feels normal….or at least a new normal. I asked Brad if he was tired of helping me and he said, “No not really, we have a pretty good routine down now”. A routine? In just 13 days we have a routine down, which means a sequence of actions regularly followed; a fixed program. Why is it that as human beings we crave routine? We love the same things to happen over and over again. Someone famous said (which of course I don’t know who!) that the definition of insanity was doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results. So if we demand a fixed program in our lives so we can feel normal, what do we expect the results of that to be? Some would say they expect their lives to be easier when they follow a routine. So the longer they are on a routine the easier their life will be, which means each day they expect their results to be better, ie a different or improved result from doing the same thing over and over again. Isn’t that by definition, insane?
Maybe it’s not crazy? Maybe it’s our motives behind why we do our routines that is insane. Let’s take another perspective like my knee rehab for instance. Every day I have to do the same thing over and over again. Three times a day for two hours I hang out with Fuzzy my CPM machine. Then two times a day I have to do my at home exercises which take 30 minutes each time. Added to this I ice my knee after every event (for those of you who are counting that’s 5 times a day of icing) which takes another 30 minutes. From this routine I expect my knee to get better, which praise the Lord I have seen small improvements! (FYI, I can now lift my foot to the second step on the stairs instead of the first!) So why do I do this routine? I do it because I want to walk one day and improve my quality of life. Why do others do their routine, why do you do your routine?
Some might do it to improve their quality of life, but others do it so that there is something in their lives that they can control. The normal life they crave which is achieved through routine is all done in vain in order to control their surroundings so that nothing bad (or good for that matter) will surprise them. It’s how they were raised and how they plan to raise their children. Be safe, do a routine forever and control your surroundings so your fear will be at bay. I know this well because I myself am a controller.
For one of the first times in my life I am still. I have no real job besides rehab and that leaves plenty of time for thinking and pondering my life and what I want to do next with it. But unlike a lot of people’s routine, I know my rehab routine is temporary, and the end result is that I will walk again with less pain. I just pray that when I can walk again I don’t slide back into crazy where I do my daily planned activities expecting an improved result; which really just means I feebly attempt to control my anxiety about future unknown events. Even though I know, “do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand”. (Isaiah 41:10)
(FYI it was Einstein who I quoted about insanity, thanks Brad! - He is so smart :)
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